Defining moment

Remember the final few seconds of 'Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.?'
The shoot out, the many Mexican soldiers, fading to sepia? Heroic and yet ultimately doomed.


I felt like that last Friday with my 'annual review.'


I've been working in the HE sector for 20 months. In all that time I've never been set any objectives, weekly, monthly, annually or otherwise.


I pointed out, within two months of starting, to my then line manager that my workload was a tad light and that I didn't really know what it was I was meant to be doing.


Her answer? There was none. She left two months later citing the bonkers organisation (and the lure of a much better job of course) as the reason. So there I am adrift in the large, lonely sea of 'what do I do now?' and discovering what already had started to dawn on me, that there wasn't very much to this position. There never was and there never would be. Goodness knows how my line manager had managed to blag her way through the various committees to creating this new position. I guess that's why I never got an answer. A little embarrassing to admit that the logic to the argument for the position would not stand the scrutiny of an average 10 year old. Anyhow, initially not deterred by lack of direction and thriving in ambiguity I stayed calm and carried on. As Confucius said 'If there is no wind then row.'


OK Confucius, that's all OK until someone takes your paddles, stops you putting your hands in the water and then the sea fret comes down and you can't see where you are and which way you are going. 


So it's a slightly embittered, mauled, disillusioned, demotivated, disconsolate employee who comes to the meeting with his two line managers. Two, yes. I've undertaken 23 annual performance reviews so far this year with my small direct team here where I (allegedly) work and with the rather larger volunteer team I manage outside work. I did them all by myself. And they need two here. 
For me. 
Must be a public sector thing, possibly an academic trait. Why use one committee when you can use two?


I decided to have it all out. It is a dangerous manoeuvre to admit that you don't have anything to do - could go very badly wrong. But this was a day that things changed. It would be a positive day, a day of resolution. I would declare all the issues, the lack of motivation, the lack of work and so on. They would work with me to help achieve the promotion I crave, ensure at least I had enough work to get me through the day or implement the redundancy process. Whatever. One way or another things would change.


Or so I thought.


I explained my senior management background (a complete surprise to them, so much for background research). I was open, candid, said I viewed the job as a survivor role but, even though it was not my ideal place to by to a long shot, I wanted to add value whilst I did it. 


I was asked about my objectives as an opening gambit. Actually I was asked to 'contextualise the role.' I had no idea what that meant.
I asked to stop it right there and said there were two fundamental problems.
1. I'm suffering quite a lot of stress from role underload
2. The position is a non job.


The response, from two academics who teach business management, was 'What's that?'


I realised, at that point, this wasn't going to be a very positive meeting if they weren't even aware of basic concepts and could only utter business school speak.


The Wikipedia definintion of a non job is;


'A non job is an allegedly pointless paid position which has few or no worthwhile outcomes, duplicates other work or positions, or is substantially overpaid for the responsibilities. Positions described as 'non-jobs' are allegedly found in abundance the in UK public sector.'


Blackwell Online defines role underload as;


'Role underload is the condition in which the individual has very few role demands, or the demands are very easily accomplished. Both overload and underload are job stressors.'


Spot on.


We didn't achieve much. 
I didn't achieve anything.


I think back to the Butch Cassidy movie ending and envision a revised one. 
'For a moment I thought we were in trouble.'
Run through the door guns drawn.
Everyone's gone home.


My meeting; heroic but ultimately doomed.